Listen to the podcast here

How do you come back from a setback? How do you stay resilient after a series of bad dates, no dates, or failed relationships? This week on the show, Kimmy’s bringing you a special episode, with a special guest. What began as an interview, transformed into a coaching session with Tim Storey, widely recognized as a legendary life coach to professional athletes and celebrities (including Oprah!).

EPISODE 189 of The Charisma Quotient Podcast is titled: Why Is Tim Storey Single?  Building Dating Resilience

Tim’s story is powerful, inspirational and will help you understand the strength it takes to stay resilient no matter what. Tim has mastered the art of turning setbacks into comebacks and has built a career on coaching stars to operate and achieve at the highest levels. If you are coming off a setback in your life, big or small – listen in to how you can avoid one of the most major pitfalls people tend to face. Listen in to hear Kimmy and Tim dive into why he’s still single! You’ll hear all about Tim’s upbringing and how he had to learn resilience at an early age. You’ll hear how Tim’s experience being raised by his mother and his 3 sisters changed his expectations of what a successful relationship looked like. And, tune in to discover Kimmy’s coaching advice to Tim about he can change the intention of his conversations in order to go deeper and make connections beyond his professional persona. If you are dealing with setbacks in your life, major or minor take this opportunity to be coached by Kimmy like she did with Tim, and sign up for a free breakthrough call with her right here:

You will learn how to bounce back stronger than you ever have been before! It just takes one decision, one call to change your dating outcomes forever.     And, keep an eye out for our “Part 2” live conversation coming soon to my Amazon Live show, Kimmy’s Love Hub on and to discuss his new book, Miracle Mentality.  Subscribe to my newsletter here to get more details about all my upcoming new shows and masterclasses coming up!

EPISODE 189 of The Charisma Quotient Podcast is titled:  Why Is Tim Storey Single?  Building Dating Resilience.  The Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

⁣ ************************************************⁣

Charisma Quotient Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and many of your other favorite podcast channels.

⁣ ************************************************⁣

The Charisma Quotient Podcast: Building Confidence, Making Connections, and Finding Love from the Outside In is hosted by Kimmy Seltzer.

⁣ ************************************************⁣

Kimmy Seltzer is a Confidence Therapist and Authentic Dating Strategist implementing targeted style, emotional and social intelligence to your life.

⁣ ************************************************⁣

Sharing a wide array of relational topics, The Charisma Quotient Podcast focuses on the themes of building confidence, making connections, and finding love from the outside in.

⁣ ************************************************⁣

This Podcast is available on:⁣ Apple Podcasts:

⁣ Libsyn:

⁣ Spotify:

And many other podcast sites.

⁣ ************************************************⁣

Would you like to connect with Kimmy? Website:

⁣ Chat:

kimbreakthrough⁣ Twitter:

⁣ Facebook:

Join her FREE Facebook Group Love Makeover Insiders:

Why Is Tim Storey Single? Building Dating Resilience

2021 has tested all of our abilities to be flexible, resilient and now more than ever is a time to spring back as the world starts to open up again with hope and a sense of renewal. As things begin to open up and we start getting together in rooms again, our social lives can become even richer. If anything, with more gratitude and excitement because we appreciate what we have. I couldn’t think of a better conversation that I’m about to share with you. It’s special. This started as an expert interview with a legendary life coach that you will hear. He’s a life coach to the stars and it turned into beautiful, vulnerable coaching with Kimmy’s session to focus on how he can use his own powers to build dating resilience and success for himself.

No one has said that the dating process was easy. Sometimes you have a great run, great dates and good relationships at first and then you may go through a slump, a series of bad dates and worse yet, bad relationships. Perhaps you would feel like you’ve made a connection with someone but after a few chatty texts and even a couple of phone calls, he ghosted you.

Maybe you’ve been on a date and it hasn’t led to a second or you’ve had a succession of bad dates and, eventually, relationships and you feel disillusioned with the whole process and want to give up. You’ve probably heard this thing called resilience. It’s a big word. Resilience has so many benefits not just to your mental health but also to your dating life. You need that resilience more than ever before.

When it comes to improving your dating life, there is one thing that’s going to help you more than anything. That is emotional resilience. This is something you cultivate over time. It’s like developing thicker skin. Things can hit you but they don’t penetrate. You don’t ruminate and don’t wallow in it. Hear me out. This does not mean that you’re growing such thick skin that it becomes your armor where you shut down, become guarded or despondent. Nor does it mean you’re developing a layer of ice where you freeze with fear and do nothing at all.

A lot of times, the brain becomes confused between emotional resilience versus resistance. Emotional resilience is your ability to withstand, adapt and overcome adversity. It’s what lets you stare rejection in the face and not let it break you. When everything feels like it’s going wrong and you feel like giving up, it’s the tenacity, stubbornness and grit that’s going to give you the strength to keep moving forward even when things are not going right. It’s what lets you roll with the punches life throws at you instead of letting them devastate you.

How does this play out in being resilient in love? You can pick yourself up and move quickly after a bad day, knowing he wasn’t right for you. It’s knowing what to do when you’re upset after being ghosted, saying you’re okay and worth the partner who respects you and recognizes what you offer. You can get back in the game quicker. It’s almost like a rubber band. It may stretch and test you but in the end, you’re able to spring back into shape and essence.

You need to develop a healthy dating practice so that you become more resilient and positive when dating. Where do you start? You heard me talk about this. It starts with a phone call. There’s this guy I’m working with now. He developed very thick dating skin. Unfortunately, this is not the resilient kind but rather the armor that keeps women at a distance. When we first spoke, he said he wasn’t ready to date. He was going to delay coaching for several months until he was ready.

TCQ 189 | Dating Resilience
Dating Resilience: You need to develop a healthy dating practice so that you become more resilient and positive when dating, but where do you start?

I asked him what did he mean by being ready. He listed 1,000 excuses. He was too busy at work, going to school and he needed to work on himself before being ready to date. I chuckled and challenged him on that. I said, “How much time have you wasted already preparing to be ready to date?” He paused and he realized, “Wow.” He had a string of bad relationships. This goes back to his childhood, wasting all this time. That’s when it hit him.

He needed the coaching to help him be ready, work on himself and create the space for dating. He needed my help in learning how to be more emotionally resilient with his dating experiences. The first thing was figuring out where the resistance was coming from. You know me by now. Being the therapist that I am, I figured out that in the past, he grew up in an unfortunate situation. It was very volatile and stressful in his home environment where his bipolar mom treated him as an emotional punching bag and his dad was emotionally unavailable and highly critical.

He would always tell him, “You’re a failure. You’re never going to make it.” On top of that, he was diagnosed with a learning disability and the teachers even thought he was autistic. Overall, he felt completely unaccepted, misunderstood and made fun of all the time. What was remarkable about him is that he overcame so much on his own through the years by building his own self-esteem through martial arts and therapy. Lo and behold, he still had tremendous difficulty finding love and dating because guess who he was picking? Emotionally unavailable women. It simulated the dynamics with his mom and the upbringing that needed to be fixed.

The dating was hard but I started working and still working with him so stay tuned. He is developing better dating habits to be more resilient and chooses healthier situations. I’ve armed him with a positive mindset, new clothes and a new profile. His profile needed a lot of work. He has some dating tools in his little basket and exercises that he has. He now has room in his life and mind to be ready to date. He’s already asked out four women, which doesn’t sound like a lot but this is a huge accomplishment for him. The rest is to be continued because he has this empowered attitude to change. He is already has changed from being resistant to being resilient.

I have an incredible guest on the line who is going to help me talk about resilience. I have a little surprise too, that we’re going to talk about not only in dating but overall in life. He is so inspirational. He has helped many people from all walks of life from entertainment legends, professional athletes, executives to deprived children throughout the world using seasoned foundational principles and humor to get honest with people to overcome the obstacles that are holding him back.

He has traveled to 75 countries and spoken to millions of people. He often meets privately to counsel high-profile leaders in various industries. He has partnered with phenomenal organizations to spread love and hope, spending time with Fred Jordan Missions in Los Angeles, Skid Row, Music Unites Day in Los Angeles, Compton schools and the Kids Haven Orphanage in Johannesburg south Africa. He leads a congregational church here in California, which meets weekly and provides spiritual insight and direction for people of diverse ages, backgrounds and needs. He’s featured on nationally syndicated Keep The Faith Radio each weekend and he is featured all over the place, Steve Harvey TV, Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday, Grant Cardone 10X Growth Con and so much more.

He has authored multiple books including Comeback and Beyond. It’s a top seller on Amazon. He has two adult children from his previous marriage and lives here in Southern California. Welcome. I’m so honored to have Tim Storey.

When it comes to improving your dating life, there is one thing that's going to help you more than anything, and that is emotional resilience. Click To Tweet

What a nice introduction. It was my people who wrote it.

Your people did a good job. From what I’ve seen in you, you’re a remarkable person. I’m happy that you’re here on the show. You have a story as we all do but I would love to hear more of your story. Also, you tipped your hat in your bio that you have children from a previous marriage. I also didn’t know if you were single. I wondered if you wanted to chat about your story and your love life.

I waited until I was 25 and married a very smart lady. She graduated from USC. We had two fantastic children, a son and a daughter. My son is two years older than my daughter. Everything was going well for the first three years and then we started seeing so many of the differences we had. I will admit, my life was going fast that had I stopped, looked and listened. I probably could have worked through things that, at that point, they seem too overwhelming. We stayed together eleven years and she calls me the best ex-husband that she hopefully will ever have.

Before we dive into this and the relationship because I’m sure a lot of people want to know more. What inspired you to do what you’re doing? You’re all about inspiring people, motivating them to move on and be resilient.

It’s some things in life we decide. It’s a choice that we make. It’s like going into a restaurant. They bring you the menu, you prose the menu and we make these decisions. There are some things in life you just discover. I believe that a lot of what I have been called to do happened to me early in sixth grade when my sixth-grade teacher, Mr. Probert took an interest in me and thought that I was someone that was a big thinker. He started challenging me to read biographies. I started reading about the life of Michelangelo, Nelson Mandela and many other people.

It helped to expand my mind on the way I was thinking. The discovery of my life was I was a humanitarian. I love the underdog. I love the hurting person. In my track of life, I decided to go to seminary. I ended up getting a Doctorate in World Religion but while I was taking classes like that, I was also taking a lot of counseling and therapy classes. I never knew that I was going to mix the humanitarian side of me and also my life coaching therapy side. That is what has happened in my life.

You’re similar to me. I always had this passion for helping people in some way, shape or form. Sometimes, there’s an outfall to that because you focus so much on other people that sometimes you lose yourself. Does that ever happen to you?

TCQ 189 | Dating Resilience
Dating Resilience: It’s a decision. It’s like a choice that we make. It’s like going into a restaurant, they bring you the menu, you peruse the menu and we make these decisions, and some things in life you just discover.

I can see that it can happen to people but I have always seen things through a happy-go-lucky way of looking at things, which is a blessing. The lens on my glasses is shiny. Even though I deal with a lot of difficult things with people with addiction or some people who pass because of different challenges in their life or getting celebrities through very difficult situations, I’ve always been able to fall back on the fact that I love life. I love humor. I consider it such a privilege to be alive. To be alive is to be animated. I’m a very animated person and that has helped me along the way.

How did you get that? I know there are a lot of people reading who want that so badly. They want to feel positive. They want to have humor and look at life that way but they don’t have that resilience built within them. They default to the victim or “why me” attitudes. What are some things you did?

I worked with a lot of therapists on this. One of the great things about my job is that with a lot of the entertainers that I work with sometimes I’m way over my head. There are about 4 therapists, 3 psychologists, 1 psychiatrist that I work with. One of the things that happen in life is that when somebody is going through a difficult time, they go with what I call singular. Everything is singular. It’s about that one thing taking place whether it’s a divorce or the company didn’t work. When we were little kids, a lot of it was plural. You could be 4 or 5 years of age. It was like, “Mommy. This is Amber. You met her at Toys “R” Us. Can she spend the night? You met her on aisle twelve.”

One of the things that I do, even in the midst of people’s hardships or my own hardships is trying to take myself back to simpler times when life is not so heavy. I am a pro at this. What I do is I purposely go to museums by myself. I still watch cartoons. I listen to a lot of music that takes me back to a good place. I do that on a daily basis. Like people that do yoga, Pilates or meditation, I do the same thing towards taking time to tap into that simple side of little Timmy’s story when I had those big eyes of expectation.

It’s the simplicity and I often tell people this all the time. It’s like being a kid again and going back to that place where you have fun and you’re in your play, like how you’re watching cartoons and whatnot. What I tell my clients all the time is, “Take an improv class. Get into that playful state where you’re letting all that noise go.” That helps but it’s hard for people to do that. You and I have trained ourselves that way but it gets hard to motivate when that’s scary for some people.

You have to start paying attention to people who maybe try to get into your life and you would not let them get into your life because they weren’t serious as you were at that time. A lot of the people that I live coach are people who were very successful and hang around people. They talk about business, pushing deeper and pushing more. Once in a while, they’ll talk about going to Italy. Not me. I have people in my life. The one reason I like them is that they’re funny or they’re light. I make room for that.

I had to go to the hospital to visit an older man that was very ill. I don’t like hospitals but in order to make this experience a little more tolerable, even though I love this man, I know that I love jello. For some reason, hospitals have some of the best jello. I said to myself, “I’m going to go see this man, be in his room for a long time and I’m going to sneak away and get my jello.” When I got my jello, I was so happy. I took a very difficult thing of a man being extremely ill who looks up to Tim Storey and then I needed a break from that because that’s very serious stuff. I went and had my jello all by myself and I became little Timmy, who was ten years of age again.

It is such a privilege to be alive. To be alive is to be animated. Click To Tweet

What also comes to me as you’re talking about that is that not only did you put him in a different state of mind but it’s also a different perspective. You can look at all the things he was hooked up to in the IV, feel the pain and focus on that but looking at the jello with whipped cream has a different perspective. It’s funny because I use the metaphor all the time of The Matrix, the movie. I tell people, “You can walk into the grocery store and the same people will be there as you saw yesterday or the day before. This time, I want you to go to the grocery store, put on The Matrix eyeglasses and you’re going to be in a different world. Now, notice who you’re noticing.” It’s perspective.

I call it the dating matrix and it has worked so many times. In fact, this one woman, she did that and thought I was nuts. I said, “Take the same route to work but this time, I want you to look around and notice who’s noticing you.” She noticed this guy and they started talking. That guy became her boyfriend.

She thought I had this voodoo doll. I said, “If I had a voodoo doll, I would be a very wealthy woman.” I said, “That was you.” Sometimes, people put too much outside of themselves too much emphasis on what others can do or blame others rather than looking within and making things happen simply from their perspective. That’s why I love that whole jello story.

You did a great breakdown on the words resilience and resistance. I loved your definition. I am a wordsmith. I spend no less than an hour a day studying words.

It’s because people get confused by that and it relates to my next question to you. I’m not going to let you get off so easy because we did start talking about your love life. I want to circle back to that. In terms of the resilience, resistance and things that you learned as you were going down your yellow brick road. What has your dating experience been then up until now?

This is going to be exclusive. This is how much I like you. I don’t even talk to Gayle King about things like this. We’re going to promote it as such because people ask me every week of my life why I’m married. Number one, I feel like I had unrealistic expectations of what a relationship should be like. I was raised by my mother and three sisters. Each one of them is older than me. They all had different personalities. One thing I learned is to be a good listener. I learned how to listen to women’s issues and chime in when I needed to be and not say anything when I didn’t need to.

According to my female friends and even many of my friend’s wives or girlfriends. They’re always like, “How come I feel like I could tell Tim Storey anything about anything?” Part of that is because of my sisters. In the idea of dating because of religion, I was into doing it right. I wasn’t going to fool around before, etc. I was 25 years of age with very little experience. I have an unusual story. I never kissed a girl until I was nineteen years of age. That’s a narrative. I did not get married until I was 25. What I thought was going to happen in a marriage is not what it was like because I thought it would feel magical. A lot of relationships are sometimes mundane. I didn’t do too well in the mundane. I don’t necessarily want to go to Costco.

TCQ 189 | Dating Resilience
Dating Resilience: When somebody is going through a difficult time, they go singular, everything is singular. It’s about that one thing that’s taking place, whether it’s a divorce or whether the company didn’t work and they go singular.

If she would say, “Babe, we’re going to go to Costco then I want to go look at drapes then I’m going to,” I’m like, “Is this happening?” At the same time, my career was exploding. I would do it because I was interesting to her and I love her. I would do it but it felt like the mundane kept creeping into my magical, almost like the movie the Blob. What I thought was going to be magical, which would be like, “I can’t wait to be home. We can’t wait to see each other.” This is when you’re early dating and you have to hold each other’s hands. We slipped into 80% mundane and that made it difficult for me.

It sounded like too. You had no dating experience.

I did not and there are two reasons behind that. This is a confession. I didn’t trust anybody because I was already known as a well-known religious, spiritual leader. I was concerned that if I dated somebody and it didn’t go the way they wanted it to, they may say something that I did not want them to say even if it was something they made up because I had heard that from other people. I was already a public person. I was a little paranoid about who I brought into my inner circle.

Before you go on, I have a question about that. Before you became who you are and in the public eye, did you always have some issues around trust or was it surfacing because you got more around the public?

I always had issues with trust.

Where does that come from?

It comes from childhood. It comes from father passing early, people not keeping their word and motives. One of the things that life gifted me with is charisma. People were pulling on my charisma and I didn’t know why. When we moved out of Compton, California then to another part of East LA, we then went to an all-White school. I was the only person of color in the entire high school. I became a lot of people’s friends because they liked me but I also became a friend to some people because I was a token friend. I picked up on that. Part of those things created trust issues in my life.

What we think is going to happen in a marriage is not what it’s like. We think that it was going to feel magical, but a lot of relationships are sometimes mundane. Click To Tweet

That’s important too, moving forward and taking a look at relationships. I work with a lot of people who are counselors, therapists and coaches like us. What happens is that your confidence becomes helping people. That’s where your identity lives. The charisma and confidence are what got reinforced. When you strip that aside and you’re like, “If I have to reveal me or share me, what will that mean? What will that look like? Will somebody go away? Will someone like me as I am?”

As I began to get older, I started speaking at age twenty. At age twenty, I got very popular. I was like a boy wonder at 23 to 25, having crowds of 10,000, 15,000, 20,000 or 30,000 and bringing in an awful lot of money. You start to wonder, “What is somebody’s mindset and motives? Is it now because of the charisma that I have or the people that I’m spending time with?” Those trust issues began to fester because I didn’t have Kim to talk to.

What you’re describing in your career, you developed a lot of resilience. You moved forward and have been recognized for that, yet in your dating life and with these trust issues, there has been some resistance.

It’s not like I sit around, thinking, “I’m missing something.” One thing I have been very blessed with are amazing friends, both male and female. I was talking to a male friend of mine and I said to him, “I would be honest and tell you. Only one day a year do I feel lonely.” It’s not a specific day. I don’t feel lonely. I have so many neat friends of all ages. I have lunch friends, dinner friends, let’s go hiking friends, let’s go to museum friends and let’s-go-to-Spain friends. I have a lot of different types of friends so I have been okay. Once a month, I may be sitting in Dayton, Ohio after speaking at an event and it’s raining. I say to myself, “What the hell is wrong with you?”

At this point, you should be speaking only in pretty places. I’m convinced for you and only where singles are.

Once a month, I like to go, “What is wrong with you?” I will admit that if I miss something, I long to be understood and connect with someone who has a similar mindset and motives. I find that the broader I become and the better platform that I get, it becomes more difficult. Here’s some honesty for you that, hopefully, your people will appreciate. I went from the boy wonder in my twenties. I’m now older. I have become the powerful older guy. When people are coming at me from all ages, I don’t know what their motives are.

Trust keeps coming back to that. I don’t know if I have the answers but we can decode some things that might help direct you. Intellectually, you might know some things. I work with a lot of powerful people too. When people are in the limelight a lot, it is hard to trust and know who is real and who is not, who likes me for me or what I do for them. It is difficult. You said you long to be understood. What has been preventing you from finding that? Is that only being in the limelight? Are there other layers there?

TCQ 189 | Dating Resilience
Dating Resilience: You start to wonder, what is somebody’s mindset and what is somebody’s motives?

I’ll give you an example. One of my good friends is named Beverly Sassoon and she was married to Vidal Sassoon for a long time. I’m close to her entire family. Another of my best friends is her daughter Eden. When I go out with Beverly Sassoon, I’m with two more of her friends in the same age range, which would be in the early 70s, very sharp, together and accomplished Beverly Hills women.

We could sit at The Ivy on Robertson and have the greatest talk. In that setting, I feel understood because they’re saying, “Tim, you remind me of so-and-so.” The more I hear from people like that and even older celebrities that I’ve known over the years, they say, “Tim, you’re an old soul. You like to talk about life and issues and the deeper things,” I’m a little bit drawn to that. When I talk about understood, it’s not only talking about a serious topic. It’s somebody getting my point of view and my perspective.

When you’re in that state, meaning you’re with somebody that you feel understood. What are you doing that’s different than when you’re maybe in your public self?

When I’m in my public self, even though I’m super down to earth, you still have to be slightly on. Let’s say I go to Las Vegas, speak to 10,000 people and we go and sign the product. The last time in Las Vegas, we were only there. We signed the product for six hours. I did meet people, talk to them and give them my contact because for many of them, it’s their first time and maybe the only time they’re ever going to connect with you. There can only be so much connection.

With that connection, people are trying to give me cards. People are saying, “Can I get your number? We need to do product together.” There are some people that are flirting with me and people that want to make sure and tell me, “I’ve never heard of you before but I’m standing in line because my wife made me.” You hear a lot of different things. That’s one side of me, the person who has to be slightly on, which you understand that as well. This laidback side of me, the jazz music side of me, museum-going, loving life, animated person, I love those talks at The Ivy in Robertson when we’re talking about life, travel and importance. I got a little bit spoiled with that. I like that.

It’s not spoiled at all. This is something I’m hypothesizing but you can tell me if this is true or not. When you are in that relaxed, jazzed state, you’re sharing more of yourself but your true and authentic self. Not what other people want to see a view for the purposes of what you’re teaching.

I love it and that’s true. For instance, if I get together with my older friends who are 70 and older, if I look tired because I work so hard, I would say 1 out of 7 days I look tired. I noticed that one of them ever says, “You look tired.” They take me at face value. If I’m with a younger person, let’s say I’m with my friend, his wife. His wife says, “You’ve got to meet so-and-so,” and that person shows up. They will mention how busy I am or it looks like I’m doing a lot of projects.

We long to connect with someone who has similar mindset and motives, and we find that the broader we become and the better platform that we get, it becomes more difficult. Click To Tweet

Many times, they’ll say things like, “I noticed you looked very tired. You look exhausted.” What that thing does is it backs me up a little bit. You start to think to yourself, “Does that mean that I can only go on with that age group when I’m on and not be my authentic self, which I am on but I am tired but I’m still on? I’m still funny. I’m still creative. I still got good things to say.”

There’s something there with that, going back to your jello. What if the one where you’re relaxed is the Tim that goes out there and dates, trusts and has jello with whipped cream? We all have different sides but it’s not Tim Storey in the public eye. It’s you. Maybe it’s little Timmy. I don’t know what it is but it’s where you’re sharing more about yourself and how you’re feeling in the day. You said that you grew up with the ascribed role, both in life and in your family, to listen and take care of others. That’s how you got reinforced. Sharing stuff about you and the authentic you is more foreign but when you do that, that’s when you’re feeling the best.

You’re giving great understanding and insight. I’ll give you a short story. Stevie Wonder said to me that one of the most difficult things about being Stevie Wonder is that when you show up to somebody’s party, the types of parties he goes to are usually in bigger homes and for some reason they have a piano. He goes, “I want to chill and dialogue with people.” Sooner or later, people start pushing my buttons and say, “Can you play this and that?” This is what has become part of my life, without saying too much because some of your audience didn’t even have a clue who I am. Who I have become is a person who can basically get to anybody in the city of Hollywood and Beverly Hills that I need to get to.

Did I say anybody? Yes, I did. I’ve been doing this since 1991. I can’t think of anybody I cannot get to in one form or fashion whether it’s the president of this or that, agent of the Kardashians or the manager of the so-and-so because I’ve been at it for so long and I’ve coached so many of their lives. For me, I may be having the greatest time talking about, “Did you know there are four seasons in Wyoming? I’m considering going there to breathe. I might ride some horses.” I may be talking like that and someone will say to me, “I heard that you are friends with,” I won’t say the name, “Yes, that’s a great friend of mine.” “I’ve been trying to get to him because I have a project that I need.” Without exaggerating, this happens to me in more than 50% of my conversations.

It’s no wonder that it does get hard to trust that people would like you for only you. Not who you are, what you know and who you know.

I’m going to end up being a very handsome man in his 90s who is super happy, living a very peaceful life, playing jazz music and eating strawberry jelly.

What is it that you want in terms of your dating and love life? That’s fine and you can be happy doing that. If you had a magic wand, you could wave it in the air and things would be different. What would that look like for you?

TCQ 189 | Dating Resilience
Dating Resilience: It’s not like we don’t have chances. They have this thing called Instagram and you have DMS and we have four people alone who just knock off these types of DMS of, “I want to meet Tim story”. That’s not just a job.

It’s not like we don’t have chances. They have this thing called Instagram and you have DMs. We have four people alone who knock off these types of DMs of, “I want to meet Tim Storey.” That’s not only a job. They take away other things as well. The idea of trying to get someone to be interested is not a problem whether I have charisma, curly hair or whatever the doggone reason.

Whatever the reason, there seems to be an interest. That’s not the problem. In time, if I found the right friend and got along with that person on a friendship level, life would be even better for me because I’m doing well now. I got all my boys. I got people willing to do things for me, jump, leap, crawl. If I had a real friend that loved me for me, that could take me to another level. That’s my story, Kim. I’m sticking to it.

The story is continuing on. It doesn’t end here because what you’re seeking is so doable. You’re in a beautiful place in your life and I would add to what you want, a friend who understands you too because that has been something for you who you can trust and understand.

That’s what we’re going to do this part two. We’re going to do part two of this someday. What makes me so unusual is that I’m not a typical person. I am a good listener. It’s not all about me. I’m not on the phone the whole time. I’m not apt for people only because people think they are attractive aesthetically. I like all types of human beings. That makes me a very unusual man.

You are an unusual man. It would be fun also if I may recommend something. I don’t know what you’ve tried and maybe this is part two, which is to date without getting attached, to share and practice all these things. What you’re doing is you’re dating yourself. I tell people that all the time. You didn’t have that. I know this and I’ll throw myself under the bus. I had a very similar history to you. I know through my journey, I had to learn about myself and what I liked versus the idea of the relationship and that’s different. I don’t know what that feels like to you when I say that but that comes to me and building those friendships that understand you.

That makes a lot of sense. Are you telling me that there’s hope for me?

There’s more than hope but it’s using your own advice that you do with other people. It’s so much easier to tell other people because also, we’re focusing on others. You need to get a little selfish, pull in, share more about yourself and it started here on the show. I’m honored.

We meet people, talk to them, give them our contact because for many of them it's the first time and maybe only time they're ever going to connect with you. There can only be so much connection. Click To Tweet

This has been a good talk and so many people are going to read this. I’m going to get many comments of, “I didn’t know you were lonely. What’s your address? I’ll bring you an apple pie.”

Do you know how many dates you’re going to get from this show? Watch out. You’re going to be inundated with all these.

I’m only listening. I’m a man with his jello.

I was going to ask for your last parting words of wisdom but I feel like that was. There’s nothing more to life than strawberries. Tim, where can everybody find your fabulousness?

We are at We have quite a nice website. We spend a lot of time, energy and finances on that. Also, @TimStoreyOfficial where we have a lot of energy that goes on there. We also do live coaching. We have an app. It was done by a man named Stanley Hainsworth, who is out of this world. He is a branding director for Starbucks, Nike and Gatorade. What does that say? He put up his own money. It’s a very good app. You can buy that on iTunes. It’s only $99. It’s called Utmost Living. I walk with you on a daily basis and we constantly put new material on there. Please get that app. It’s fantastic.

Everyone needs to check this guy out. You’re incredible. Thank you so much for coming on and being vulnerable. We did a little coaching session.

You are good. Kim, you made me open up about things.

It’s because that’s what we do here on the show.

Thanks for joining me. Remember, you can build confidence, make connections and find love from the outside in. If you want to know more, make sure you go to my site, If you want to learn how to build more dating and relationship resilience in your life, this is a perfect time. Hop on a free call with me as I did with Tim. Keep an eye out for part two live conversation coming up to my Amazon Live Show, Kimmy’s Love Hub on Sway TV.

I’m going live with Tim to talk about how to take your dating resilience with a little bit of a Miracle Mentality, which is the name of his new book. I’m going to be talking about his new book and part two of this conversation. Who can use a little miracle? Subscribe to my newsletter and you will be the first to know what I’m up to on Kimmy’s Love Hub. I often have these guests stop by and you never know who might stop by next. Stay tuned until the next episode with more tips on how to feel and look fabulous every day. That’s all for now.

Important Links:

About Tim Storey

𝐖𝐡𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐓𝐢𝐦 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐲?

Tim Storey is an acclaimed author, speaker, and life coach, known for inspiring and motivating people of all walks of life, from entertainment executives, celebrities, and athletes to adults and children in the most deprived neighborhoods in the country. Tim has traveled to seventy-five countries and spoken to millions of people. He often meets privately to counsel high-profile leaders in various industries.

Along with a rigorous speaking calendar and private life-coaching sessions, Tim regularly appears on nationally syndicated radio and television shows and has hosted an exclusive Saturday morning series on SiriusXM Radio.

Tim also leads The Congregation Church in Pacentia, CA, which meets weekly and provides spiritual insight and direction for people of diverse ages, backgrounds, and needs.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐥𝐞 𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

Overcome toxic thoughts and negative thinking with Tim Storey’s easy to follow instructions and simple guidance.

During challenging times, toxic thoughts can drag you into a mindset that’s mundane, messy, and mad. Negative thinking can undermine all aspects of your life, from family and romantic relationships to career satisfaction, financial stability, and physical and spiritual health. To overcome these obstacles, you need a new mindset–a miracle mentality–where dreams are achievable, hope is actionable, and spiritual healing is possible.

In the Miracle Mentality, life coach, speaker, and author Tim Storey provides you with a road map to transcend negative thinking, leading you to bigger adventures, more opportunities, and deeper meaning.

𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐥𝐞 𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲:

“The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your mindset! Tim Storey has been helping people transform their lives for decades and his timeless wisdom in this book will support you in turning any setback into your biggest comeback!”

— Lewis Howes, New York Times bestselling author, entrepreneur, and host of The School of Greatness podcast

“You are incredibly powerful. And that’s the good news and the bad news. You can make anything happen with the right thinking—and you also can make a lot of bad stuff happen to you with the wrong thinking. Mindset and how you approach life, business, and problems determines the outcome and conditions of your life. You can do anything with the right mindset.”

— Grant Cardone, bestselling author, renowned speaker, social media influencer, and real estate mogul

About the Author Kim

Share your thoughts

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}


Let’s be Pen Pals

I’ll drop in with self-love affirmations, encouragements, and confidence-building techniques created for high-achievers, like YOU!